Rabbity Rewind

I am pretty sure this is a repost, I just can't find where I posted it prior.  Thought I would dust it off and let it dance with the Devil in the pale moonlight, especially in light of the passing of yet another 'decade more.'

Another Chapter

thorn crowned

bearing truths and pasts

weighty aspirations

of dreamers

fallen short

a decade more

secure in their blankets

freeing; fleeing

remaining

barbed, branded and broken

escape inevitable

but never coming

phoenix flames

slowly burning to ash

awaiting only

another chapter

© 2010 | M. Coelho Chadwick

Ode to Winter

With the recent onslaught of cold weather - snow in Texas - nipples hardened not by the foxy furnace repair man, but the chill in the air - a need for earmuffs and far too many clothes...  My inner bard was inspired by all this spaztastic chillyness to write a poem in honour of this frosty-ass frigid bitch that is vexing us all.  I hope you enjoy it.

Fuck!

It's Cold.

The End.

Used to be... Okay?

I'm tired.  Of the brokeness.  Sometime in my 30s I fell apart.  I used to be made of rubber - bouncing from one grand adventure to the next.  Then the cracks came.  Sometime in the nights - quiet like thieves and those tale-tell wrinkles around your eyes. 

And I broke. 

Fell to bits and a thousand pieces.  Splattered legos droped from a rooftop in a rainbow of carnage.

I don't want you to heal me.

Fix me.

Save me.

Just give me some crazy glue and hope.

And a fucking band-aid.

Okay?

Six Words Saturday

Six Word Saturdays is a weekly series over at Call Me Cate's very funny blog, Show My Face.

Mine for this week are:

I'm ready for the next chapter...

It's been a rough road these past few months - this entire year, to be honest - but I am looking forward to what lies ahead. I have realized so much. Past people have wandered into my world again; present people have faded out. Priorities have changed. And the possibilities are seemingly endless. "It's all happening..."

And then, this morning, this gal made an appearance... Scritching and scratching her way out onto the page. I hope you enjoy it!

Untitled (as of yet)

In my tree with Natalie

spying on packed bags

and promises broken

I climb a ladder

of stolen pens

and paper scrapped

for inspiration

scrubbing free the

yesterdays

i revel in you as

eraser dust

blown away

nothing more now

than shadowed smudges

on parchment weathered

Maya Angelou's recitation of "Still, I Rise"

The glorious poet herself reciting the piece I posted yesterday. Fabulous. Fabulous. Fabulous.

"I rise. I rise. I rise."

("There I go rising...")

Rising on the Winds of Self

I've been reciting this all day today. It's very empowering; magical. Thought I would share...

Enjoy.

[Image: Rise of Dream by "Moroka323"]

Still, I Rise

by Maya Angelou

You may write me down in history

With your bitter, twisted lies,

You may trod me in the very dirt

But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?

Why are you beset with gloom?

'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells

Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,

With the certainty of tides,

Just like hopes springing high,

Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?

Bowed head and lowered eyes?

Shoulders falling down like teardrops.

Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?

Don't you take it awful hard

'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines

Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,

You may cut me with your eyes,

You may kill me with your hatefulness,

But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?

Does it come as a surprise

That I dance like I've got diamonds

At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame

I rise

Up from a past that's rooted in pain

I rise

I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,

Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear

I rise

Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear

I rise

Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,

I am the dream and the hope of the slave.

I rise

I rise

I rise.

Living in Meaning

the Belle tolls
but not in sorrow
as she swims
her oceans
to distant shores
walking rebirthed
and gloried
amongst Tigers
celebrating the journeys
of all that has come before

© 2009/Micael C. Chadwick

[photo (and inspiration): Ellie at Sensuous Broom]

Daze is Done

beacon lights blinking
beckoning the woeful zombies
to the Glamazon Queen
armed with red flags and falsies
her stance stalwart
in deterring her suitors
bashing in heads
and cocooning them
in their own apathy
barring the door
and breaking free
out the window
and down the street
fleeing in a flurry
of frenzied glitter
and shouts of
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

© 2009/Micael C. Chadwick

Dark Mourning of the Soul

dark mourning of the soul
for times lost
she never had
reaching out
scrambling through the shadows
wrapping them around her
like an old familiar
shying from the light
and its hateful glare
exposing truths
she already knows
her remorse
for things ungained
pockets emptied
and embers long since doused
remains her constant
her lover
her friend
and the sole consistency
of her mourning

© 2009, Micael Chadwick

I find your offense offensive.

you scolded me for
darkening your circle
dancing shadows
into your flash light fallacies
assaulted like a rape victim on
new year's eve
left to heave and bleed
in the snow
when i realized
the blood on my hands
and between my thighs
was my own
so with it
i decorate my own
pretention
smearing crimson arcs
of gore
across the landscape
of the fake world
i have created
to hide from the hurt
of the real one
changing my name
and embracing
the demons within

© 2008 by MCChadwick

Home

I stand
exhausted
danced to death
trampled
in the faerie circle
i dared to re enter
waiting for the mother's ship
to flutter by
and carry me
from this mud trodden
bus stop
i feel my back cracking
wings unfurling
in glorious rebellion
and i realize i can fly
myself home
to my family and away
from these earth bound
fae ways of judgement
and i suddenly
find myself
at Tara
amongst kin
singing to save
her soul
and uniting our own
in a cacophonous flight
of butterfly magic
music
truth
and light

© 2008 by MCChadwick

Get Off (My Ass)

I didn't kill the fucking rabbit
I didn't kill my daughter
Blue Bus passenger
backseat
when we hit the speed bump
Easter Eggs spattered
like a cum stain on a
one night stand
wipe your eyes
spit or swallow
a thousand sons
daughters
kin and grandkids
dying on your
hypocritical lips
it was not my control
to wield or relinquish
the razor blade gulp
caught me unawares
too
leaving me in the same cloud
of dust and exhaust
blind dazed
by its glory and finality
broken limbed and bleeding
entrails draped over your judgement
and the ropes binding me to your stake

© 2008 by MCChadwick

Shepherd: Less

I don't want
to hold your hand
I want you
to hold mine
lead me
instead of playing
follow the leader
carry my baggage
be my porter
let me wash the dust
from my faded smile
and rest awhile
take charge
make dinner
leave me be
and let me recharge
or else
the well might run dry
the cabinets emptied
channel surfing
without cable
and where would
you all be then
shepherdless sheep
in a world of wolves

© 2008 by M.Chadwick

Cheers

I'm tired of being
Everything
I don't want to be
Anything
Martyr Goddess
Diva Superman
Glorified Nigger
Friend and Foe
I don't want to be
Raging like Dylan
in the dark
Plathesque
I'm tired of being
Miss Vida Standing
Chelsea's death
Mother's Failure
Grandma's pride
Fuck it
I.
Am.
Tired.
I want to shut the fuck up
and go sit down somewhere
I want to be
not nice
not pretty
not dazed
not me
Hell in a handbasket
on a midnight train to Georgia
I'm tired of being
a thousand me's
for a thousand you's
Fuck.
It.
(And fuck you, too)

(c) 2008 by M.Chadwick

Yes. You.

Blessed Be and Be Gone

I am God
of my universe
I am Earth Mother
to a thousand children
of love and darkness
I am Kali
to your bullshit
I am Aprodite
to your northward
pointing
lust
I am the Green Man
to fields of creativity
I dance in the Dark
I howl at the Moon
I scream at the Make Believe
all the while you
there
hiding
behind your warm fuzziness
like a mold
a fungus
a moss
covering your own life
suffocating
condemning mine
which you haven't the right
to consider
and to this i simply say
Blessed.
Be.
and
Be.
Gone.

© 2008 by M.Chadwick

Last

I felt your faith splatter
across my face
stinging my eyes
and I knew the lies
were true
another had invaded
your escapades
teaching you new
ways to swish a hip
bump and grind
let it slide
you failed miserably
at the one test
you had to pass
monogamy
so while you sleep
with a razor blade's kiss
i remove the offense
rendering you faithful
making it impossible
for you to fail me again

© 2009/Micael C. Chadwick

Travis

breath held
for a year
waiting word
scouring news
longing to hear
anything
whispers of your safety
mentions of your name
your surprise return
caught me unguarded
whirlwind spin
of relief
euphoric elation
hands tremble
in anticipation
of seeing your face
once again
your existence
still unreal
a figment
dream come true
until I touch you
once again
home soiled
beyond enemy lines

(c) 2008 by MCL

Travis was a "friend" of mine that went to war in Iraq when the shit hit the fan the first time. He came home, but he never really came back. The horrors that he saw over there... The horrors he had to perform... It changed him in ways that none of us could ever touch. I don't know that any of us would ever be able to touch him again. Not like before. The boy we knew when he left Ft. Hood that day is lost to us. As Thomas Wolfe said, "The golden boy is lost forever and can never return again." Such a shame.... He was a great guy.

Cheers

I'm tired of being
Everything
I don't want to be
Anything
Martyr Goddess
Diva Superman
Glorified Nigger
Friend and Foe
I don't want to be
Raging like Dylan
in the dark
Plathesque
I'm tired of being
Miss Vida Standing
Chelsea's death
Mother's Failure
Grandma's pride
Fuck it
I.
Am.
Tired.
I want to shut the fuck up
and go sit down somewhere
I want to be
not nice
not pretty
not dazed
not me
Hell in a handbasket
on a midnight train to Georgia
I'm tired of being
a thousand me's
for a thousand you's
Fuck.
It.
(And fuck you, too)

Dildo

i give no shit
i have no shit to give
if i am not yours
by your fucked sideways standards
your father mother
your lover hater
your child neglected
fucked up parent
i am not yours
ever
nor ever will i be
i am mine
woman phenomenonally
man cub
child of the wolves
birth of a chicken
set to devour
your bullshit
your hatred
your false pretense
you no longer exist
i am me
i am mine
i will rise
and you
the pyre of the phoenix
will burn to cinder
ash and rubble
you will expire
never to fly again
with your manipulations
war crimes and tactics
you
my loves and hates
will vanish like
the weapons of
mass destruction
you weilded against
my broken hearth
only to watch yourself
ass in the air
like the power bottom bitch
that you really are
slapped down like the whore
that you love
with your double ended dildo
of life

fired hydrant

why won't the bleeding stop
when you've certainly removed
your knife from my back
and prettied yourself up again
to look like the tart that you are
and claim to hate
and I realize
as your blade
tore through my spine
crippling me
it pierced my heart
the only thing I had left to offer
now spews forth
with your puerile disciples
dancing in its spray
red slicked children
reveling in the summer's heat