Wednesday, October 15, 2003

Go Away

"feeling old by 21
never thought my day would come..."

"make me laugh
say you know what you want
you said we were the real thing
so I show you some more and I learn
what black magic can do
make me laugh
say you know you can turn
me into the real thing
so I show you some more
and I learn..."

The tides turn. I am weary of endless self-indulgent rambles of shit that make no never mind to me. I am weary of unwarranted obligations bound by guilt. I am weary of high-school antics played by physically grown adult (though the mentality is left for speculation). I am weary of the proverbial "Gay Community" (enough said on that one lest I vomit on myself). I am weary, and I am done.

I made a conscious effort to branch out of my Hermit’s shell and embrace the so-called life around me. I have since discovered I do not like it. I remember now why I retreated to the fortress within my self imposed walls. People are simply not worth it. They either annoy me, piss me off, or completely drain me to the point that I haven't anything left for myself. FUCK that. One might say it a poor choice of acquaintances, but I am beginning to think there is something inherently wrong with me because the same type of people are forever entering my life. I officially declare myself an Emotionally Crippled Self Serving Mental Patient Freak Magnet. And I give up.

Go Away. I am who I am. I owe you nothing. And I need not answer to any of you for anything I choose to so. If you are not for me you are against me. I have no use for you.