Monday, February 8, 2010


Okay my loyal Rabbiteers, feed me back on this one.  At what point do you just say fuck it?  I have been racking my brain trying to figure out something to do for a friend of mine for Valentine's Day...  My problem is not what to do (though I have not yet figured that out yet, either) but really more of a 'why bother' type issue.  Most times when I try to do something for this person, I get little to nothing from them, or a snide remark.  So, well...  Do I even make the effort or is it just a 'why bother'?  I am one of those that squees with unadulterated joy at something as simple as a box of crayons.  Woo hoo!!!  Now, mind you, I do not expect that, in the least, but a dick's drip of graciousness might not be that bad.  

It just makes me not want to even try.  I do what I can - usually in trade with others for graphics or hair-dids or the like because I haven't a real income and am more broke than an unfunny joke.  So I am limited and what little I usually CAN do takes some effort and finagling.  The last thing I managed (to do) was met with "well that's great but it doesn't pay the rent."  Well, fuck you too then.  Give it back then.  I really don't know what to do.  A part of me wants to do something - but then a part of me doesn't want to get my feelings hurt again.  Even knowing what to expect and steeling myself for it, I still get my feelings hurt.  It's just how I am.  I expect everyone else to be like me knowing full well 99% of them are unmitigated pus oozing asshole monkeys.

So, my conundrum is - do I even try?  Or do I just let them sit there sad and ignored because you know aint no one else is going to do any damned thing for them either for the holiday?  Maybe I should just do something for myself instead...  No hurt feelings there...

What would you do?  What should I do?  Ugh.  I really hate people sometimes.  So ugly.